Now that tomato seeds
are blooming in sewage pools,
soon we'll see a real-life version
of Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.
Instead of animatronic beef tomatoes
shredding San Diego like cheddar,
these vicious green baubles
will invade your dreams like Freddy Krueger
(but will do a better job of it).
Mr. Darcy will end up split in half
in a tomato's jaws. The Avengers
will become flatter than playing cards,
while the Terminator will be reduced
to playing call centre music after
the tomatoes are through. The Transformers
might be relegated to cleaning up
Paramount film sets.
And, you, you will receive skies
darker than the worst tarot card
when the tomatoes have rummaged
through the filing cabinet of your desires:
The Hawaii wedding, the Norwegian cruise,
the house and two kids will be blended
into passata. Beg for mercy
before everything faces to cut.
